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Saturday, March 19, 2005
Not feeling well today. So i woke up early... all ready to go for my ch project meeting... but went back to bed after showering, cos' really no energy to do my project, just knew that i'll faint on the way from my room to the bus stop... then didn't take breakfast... so was feeling crampy and hungry and sucky until the afternoon.... then as i felt better in the afternoon... i was stoning away... still not feeling good and was hoping night will come quickly. Think I was longing for company and nobody was around. Then jf told me he'll be going home soon. Ok so well... just when i thought he wouldn't be coming to see me before he left, he appeared.... ok that was nice. It's easy to make me happy right... Yup. But when I'm all alone... i often let my thoughts wander... often in a yearning mood to be loved just a bit more.... often asking myself whether i deserve the bad things that happen to me or not... often thinking of him and wishing he can be next to me.. and not just look for me only when he needs detergent. Tonight i miss him a lot. As usual... nobody will know all these feelings of mine. My left shoulder's been aching past few nights... can't lean on my right. Can't lean on my left too even tho' it's more comfortable. It's not like I've been doing vigorously straining activities... just freakin' hurts maybe cos' I'm tired?!. Maybe it's a sign to tell me to rest well. What's the big deal.... Wanna blog about the success of my cmb concert... but really not so free to do this... cos' it'll be a super long blog... another time perhaps. In the meantime, I wanna find some time to chill out anywhere... at least have some private time, or just chill out with friends in the midst of projects, projects and projects. I still miss jf~ and I wanna chill.... chill.... chill out.... Posted at 12:15 AM |
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